11,000 year old man holding penis / Celebrities sued for BAYC affiliation / Over 200 pre-columbian artifacts returned to Mexico!

Hello everyone. Welcome back to Buy Amara. This is a weekly news show where I discuss contemporary events in the art and history fields.

I'm your host and personal curator, Amara Andrew. The format for the show that I typically follow, but I also typically don't follow, is one used by Western brides: something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue. This week, we're going to have one something old, one something new, and one something borrowed/stolen.

This week, we're going to be discussing an 11,000-year-old man holding his weener, a slew of celebrities that are being sued alongside Bored Ape Yacht Club, and a slew of pre-Colombian artifacts that were successfully returned to Mexico. So, we've all that and more coming up on this episode of Buy Amara. Let's get to it.

This is normally the part of the show where I have updates. You'll notice if you're watching the video version of this podcast,

There's another chair and another microphone. And no, I'm not bringing my Ghostbusters friend onto the show, even though that would actually be really cool. I have a special guest today.

I thought it would be fun to kind of switch it up a little bit. So, you will not only hear my lovely, horrific voice, but you'll actually hear the lovely voice of a Greek god, a Greek demigod. He is

The man, the myth. Well, actually, first, I should do a little introduction. I don't know how to introduce you.

He's the co-founder of SPYR, which is a branding agency here in Chicago. He is featured and a producer of the Netflix documentary, Minimalism. And he's my live-in lover,

Jeff Cerise. Come on down! I didn't get Price is Right music in time.

Long time listener, first time caller.

You should come more this way. Oh, that's fine.

Long time listener, first time caller.

Welcome to the show.

Hi.

Okay. So like I said, this is normally the part of the show where I have updates, but now I have a human. Okay, so updates.

Well, first, thanks for having me. I appreciate the nice intro.

You're welcome. My Greek demigod live-in lover. He's like, "Wow, that's Stop building it up so much." I could see the fear in his eyes as I was saying this stuff.

He's like, "I don't know." Anyhoo, yeah, so I just thought I'd switch it up a little bit this week just to try it out. I don't know. If it works, cool.

If not, then we might be breaking up, so yeah. Kick you out.

Yeah, so we'll just get on to the show. So updates. Normally, I have some updates.

I actually don't have any this week. Nothing has really happened for the news stories that I've talked about in previous episodes. But I mentioned, I think, the episode before or the episode before that, our couch was not finished because IKEA, for some godforsaken reason, was taking so long to ship us our cover.

First world problems. But it's complete! We now have a sectional.

Because it's sexy. And then we also have a new coffee table and it's all Christmasy in here. I wish you could see the sides because there's just Christmas everywhere.

This is like the least Christmasy side and then there's like more Christmasy side. But whatever, you can see it. Oh, check out my social media, like Instagram or TikTok, and you can see videos where I have all the Christmasy stuff in the background.

It looks really pretty. Anyway, so that is my update for this week. I have a human here.

We have a new couch and coffee table. Yes, this is the human. And yeah, that's basically it.

So anyway, on to the show!

I'm glad I have somebody else to listen to the music with in person.

I wasn't I wasn't informed of the appropriate dance for it, so I'll have to learn for next time.

It's interpretive. It's whatever you want.

Okay.

I went to art school, so everything's interpretive.

Interpretive analysis.

We are interpret— We're close.

I'm an art teacher.

I think he's mocking me. Well, this is going to go great. This will be the hidden This'll be the lost episode that never makes it out.

This isn't the first time we've done a podcast together, either.

No, we actually had one for a little bit, when I still worked Oh god, I always hit my microphone with my face cause I get so into it. We actually had a podcast for a little bit. It was Side Hustle Saturday, I think?

So, we had our own podcast, Control F, and then on my show, Starting Now, we would do Side Hustle Saturday.

Yeah.

But now your side hustle is your front hustle, so we're going to have to talk about We're going to have to talk about Front Hustle Friday.

I don't like that.

It's not a side hustle. It's full time. That's all I mean.

But carry on. You run your show. I'll just be here.

Okay. So, our something old this week is going to be We're going to be talking about the oldest narrative scene we have in society, ever, in documented history, is of a man holding his weener.

Yes, I said weener.

What?

So, this past week or the week before, it was sometime within the last couple weeks, whatever, this stone two-panel carving—I need to figure out where I'm going to put graphics, actually. I think I'm going to put them right here, maybe. I don't know, I'll figure it out in post.

I'll hold them.

Okay. Here's Here's the slab. So, apparently, this stone two-panel carving was discovered by archaeologists in Turkey in an 11,000-year-old complex, so like a situation of buildings in Sayburç or Sayburç.

I'm so sorry, I don't know Turkish, so I don't know how to pronounce all the different accents. I'm guessing Sayburç, but I have no idea. Do you know?

No.

Excellent. So, this engraving of a man holding his weener was found on benches that lined the walls in a communal area. So, this was literally a series of benchings benches.

Benches! It's the bench for your pension, benches. But it was seriously in a communal area, so it just would have been like out in the open.

There's there's a lot of ancient dick art out there, which was like my favorite thing to learn when I was studying art history, was just how many dicks there are. But anyway, that's my own personal love, I guess. So, this guy holding his dick, though, wasn't the main focal point of this engraving.

So, like I said, there were two panels.

Both panels, though, portray a person in the middle facing dangerous animals. So, this is where the narrative scene comes into play. So, on the left panel, we see a squatting male figure who holds something like a snake kind of in his hand, and he's going up against a bull.

The right panel, with the man grabbing his schlong, leopards are approaching him from either side. And so, in these panels, I'm I'm painting you a word picture.

No, I'm I'm Yeah, I'm picturing it.

So, it's all just carved stone, so I'm saying panels, but she's constantly hitting my face. So sorry. But the leopards in these panels, they have really sharp teeth and the bull looks really ferocious and it's it's supposed to be a very like

Scary kind of scene a little bit. So, excavations of this site began in 2021 and have revealed that this entire area in Turkey was inhabited

Inhabited.

You got it.

I think you have the Turkish accent down right there, so you need to stick with that one.

It's Turkish Midwestern. So, excavations of this site began in 2021 and revealed that the this area in Turkey was actually inhabited by a Neolithic population, which you'll find this interesting. So, this specific population, there's evidence that it was transforming from that mobile hunter-gatherer ancient society to the more sedentary farming lifestyle.

Cuz he's from that time period. Speaking of old person holding their weener,

This guy! You should see what he's doing with his other hand under the table.. This episode's not going to go very well.

But wait, one is holding a snake and the other is holding their

Well, it's like a snake-like, it's like a thing that looks like it might be a snake, but it's not really known exactly. Like, we don't really know what the story is, either, obviously, because I'm not there in Turkey. But archaeologists are still trying to figure out what the narrative scene is, so it's kind of believed it's like a before and after sort of scene of this guy.

But fun fact, so there are other older narrative scenes that do exist, just want to put it out there. So, there are the 17,000-year-old Lascaux cave paintings, if you've ever seen those. You've been to France.

And then

That's my mom's last name. Maiden name was Laskowski, so basically all the same.

Yeah, totally the same. France, Poland, same thing. So, we have the 17,000-year-old Lascaux cave paintings and then a 44,000-year-old cave panel that was on the island of Sulawesi, but

These Turkish panels, though, are believed by archaeologists to be the first known progression of a story narrative. So, I think it's kind of I was kind of trying to figure out what that meant. I don't know, I'm so sorry.

But I think it's like the guy was like scared and then now he's like, "I'm fearsome," because like dicks in ancient art a lot of times were a show of masculinity and pride and virility and stuff like that. So, like in ancient Rome, just dicks galore. So, it was to be like, "No, I'm like a big strong guy."

Was that the one with the bull or was the snake with the bull?

The snake and the bull go together. So, the guy he's he's holding something, it's not a It might not be a snake, but Sorry, you're close. But it's something in his hand, but he's like squatting down.

Okay.

So, I don't know, do you know what it means?

It does feel like they're connected. Like connected in the like It's almost like a euphemism of sorts. Like it's it's alluding to his junk in the first one.

And then in the second one, he is proudly holding his junk as the felines look on.

Yeah, see, I don't have junk, so I don't know. But I think it's in the DNA of the junk holders. So, they know.

You're the junk man. Jeff Junkman Cerise.

This episode is not coming out. Like I said, we don't really know what this story is. I like his hypotenuse.

Right angles. Fucking nerds. Well, you are on an art history podcast.

Anyway, but it's believed that this could be a historic— Why am I having trouble? Were you going to say something?

But this could be a historical or a mythical story of the region's traditions, even. So, when they know, I will let you know because I'm very curious why this guy is holding his dick. As things progress, they'll find more scenes probably on these benches.

But for now, we just know that there's a man holding his weener. Yeah, actually, here, you sing our music.

I don't remember how. I just

So, our something new this week, there are a whole slew of celebrities that are part of a new lawsuit against Yuga Labs, who's the parent company of Bored Ape Yacht Club. So, this story is actually mostly why I have this guy on. He's a computer man, and NFT connoisseur.

I'm the junk man and the computer man.

He's the man! So, I thought you would find this very interesting. Instead of telling him in person, I'm Well, we are in person.

Hologram! Instead of just telling him over dinner, I was like, "I'll just have him here, so then I kill two birds with one stone."

If you find me chilled by a stone, you know what happened.

Or a weener man. Chairs are squeaky. Anyway, so this lawsuit was followed.

This lawsuit was filed by, this is like a wild name, Adonis Real or Real. You kind of barely fit in frame, I just realized.

I was wondering. Am I think I'm there. Yeah, I'm here.

Oh, okay. Cool. So, this lawsuit was filed by Adonis Real and Adam Titcher, and they state that they purchased Bored Ape Yacht Club NFTs only after they saw the endorsement of influential celebrities who they say inflated the value of these NFTs.

Basically what I heard was, "I'm naive and I have buyer's remorse." That was just me. I know it's a very harsh take, but I kind of don't care because it's like, well, I bought a bunch of shit off Amazon, but I didn't blame the people for selling it to me. I didn't blame the influencers.

I was like, "Well, no, it was my responsibility," but how do you feel about responsibility like that?

So, how did you say that? They're suing them for what? Can you say it one more time?

They This is my own paraphrasing of what I read. But they purchased NFTs, they purchased Bored Ape Yacht Club NFTs, only after they saw the endorsement of influential celebrities who they say inflated the value of the NFTs.

Yeah, so it's the perceived value that this would return them money and make them a lot of money, which was the problem with NFTs, and that was Yeah, it's why everything sort of went kaboom recently this year. Because there was lots of promises that like some people made a ton of money and then like everyone's going to make a lot of money and we're all going to make it and all these things that everyone was saying, but just couldn't be true.

Like I think everyone can win when it comes to comes to life and success,

But when it is something as like concrete as buying and selling buying something, selling it for more, eventually someone is going to pay the most and no one is going to be left to buy it because there isn't there aren't unlimited funds. So, that is It's tough because it does It is buyer's remorse, like you said. It's something that's difficult to It feels like it would be difficult to sue over.

I understand disappointment on their part, yeah. But at the same time,

Well, let me tell you the rest of it, then.

Oh, yeah, keep going.

Cuz, yes, and here's more. Okay, so

They're complaining that it was celebrities who did the whole thing. But here is also where more of the story comes in.

And they're suing Yuga, not the celebrities, or everyone?

So, they list Yuga as well as a bunch of celebrities, which I'm going to tell you who in a minute.

Okay.

So, they list like 100 people in the actual court document. It's like fucking wild. It's so big.

It's like a whole paragraph of people. And it's in all caps, so it's like, "You're yelling at me!" In their complaint, they specifically blame Hollywood talent manager Guy Oseary, who represents a bunch of different celebrities like Madonna, U2, and the newly signed Bored Ape Yacht Club.

Yeah. So, this is through his company Maverick. I think he's now not affiliated with it anymore.

I think he's stepped down, so he's the ex-head of Maverick. So, he also though represents MoonPay. Here's where it gets weirder, which is a crypto trading app.

I'd never heard of it. Had you heard of it?

Yeah, I've heard of it. I've never used it. I don't know too much about it.

Oh, okay. That's why I have him here.

Yeah, I know of it.

Okay. So, well, you'll learn a little bit now. So, the plaintiffs, so the people who are doing the suing, allege that Yuga Labs conspired with Oseary to get celebrities to promote Bored Ape Yacht Club NFTs, while also hiding that these celebrities were receiving any compensation for their promotion.

So, the complaint reads, quote,

"The manufactured celebrity endorsements and misleading promotions were able to artificially increase the interest in and price of the Bored Ape Yacht Club NFTs," causing investors to purchase these "losing investments at drastically inflated prices." So, they also have one piece of evidence, which was really interesting.

There's a scene from Post Malone's 2021 music video for "One Right Now," where Post is seen buying a Bored Ape using the MoonPay app, and then the musician, the Weeknd, is also there. So, MoonPay apparently shared this clip on Twitter with the caption, "This just happened."

So, is Post Malone under the same Maverick, do you know?

That I don't know.

But it would I would posit to say that probably.

Yeah.

Just And it makes me wonder if Jimmy Fallon and Paris Hilton and sort of the key players in the celebrity world that bought them and made it something

So, I'm glad you say them, because some of the celebrities that were listed in the complaint are Madonna, Paris Hilton, Jimmy Fallon, Justin Bieber, Gwyneth Paltrow, Serena Williams, Snoop, which they list him as his like his birth name, Calvin.

Oh. Okay, yeah.

I read it and I was like, "Who the fuck is this?" And then I was like, "Oh my god, it's Snoop." Kevin Hart, Steph Curry, and Khalid, who's a rapper, among other celebrities in there. So, the two plaintiffs' lawyers allege that video clip is evidence that, sorry, that there is evidence on the blockchain that Post actually got transferred $1.4 million worth of ETH.

ETH.

ETH.

Ugh.

ETH. Which they claim is evidence that he was paid for his promotion of Bored Ape Yacht Club in this music video.

Well, and it's so weird because it could even be indirectly. So, if it wasn't

When they're all under the same umbrella, that's very suspect.

Yeah.

Because it could be advice within that little community, that little group of like, "Oh, you're"

"you're part of my crew."

Like did you say talent agent? What was it?

Yes.

Okay. So, part of this, "I'm going to let everyone know this is valuable. So and so just bought it," who happens to also be under the same umbrella, "so and so is buying one.

You probably want to get on." So, it's like from a pure human side of things,

It's just like it could be looked at as telling friends.

Right.

But when you're all part of the same business and the people who can benefit most, the company who can benefit most from a pump, say, of value, is also under the same umbrella, that's when things do get very touch-and-go.

But yeah, that's what was interesting is reading the intro to it before, I was like, "Oh, these fucking idiots," but then when you get the celebrity mixed in with stuff, that's when things always get a little weird, cuz it's like, well, they are celebrities and you do have to be careful with your celebrity and everything you have, but then I don't know.

Well, also disclosure in NFTs and crypto is non-existent.

A huge issue, because like anyone who's been building a business,

Which is ironic because on the blockchain, you can see every single transaction.

Yeah.

But not the partnerships and things like that.

Yeah, but you can track and see where the money came from, where it originated, where it went to, and that's the thing is like anyone who's built a business, worked in anyone who was a blogger, affiliate marketer, all these things for any substantial period of time,

In this episode at the bottom of the description on YouTube, you will see my

Yeah, there's affiliate links and a disclosure that Amara will make a small amount of money at no cost to you if you click those links and buy the products.

Love you.

But like that's that's a way to support people in their work and everything. But as soon as you're not disclosing that and you're not, which no one in Web3 and crypto seemed to, in NFTs and stuff,

Yeah.

Which was a major problem. So, it's I'm not surprised, but it's disappointing because it's very clear that they needed to.

Well, cuz it could have been a really good thing and then it only took like three people, mostly just Bored Ape, to fuck everything up in many ways. Like that's my viewpoint on it. I know we have we have very different viewpoints on things, especially AI art, which we'll talk about that at another time because that has been a hot topic in our household.

Well, yeah. Like Bored Ape gave people a lot of money, which is nice. I'm trying to see if I can move this to my lap, see if that works.

They essentially printed money for the whole year, so people loved it. They're like,

And they did talk about ApeCoin, also, in their complaint, which I didn't elaborate on that, but that was a whole scam. But I want to keep this brief.

Yeah, for sure. But yeah, so they were essentially printing money for people. And then they then as soon as you have celebrities and people who have a lot of money also get in on board, it can it can mislead uninformed people, and that's not I don't say that as a negative towards the people who don't know, but you don't know what you don't know.

And if you're like Paris Hilton bought a Bored Ape, she spent so much money, I should spend my life savings on one, because it's going to make me a lot of money, too.

Yes, and I know people who do that, who are like, "Oh, Paris Hilton did this. You should do that," which is very sweet and very lovely, but you got to think for yourself and like that was a whole thing in the Bored Ape community or Bored Ape, just NFT community where it was "do your own research," which I think is a really shitty expression, but I like the idea of it where it's like, well, you have to be very, very careful, because that's It's just like with anything.

You don't just walk down the street because you're like, "Oh, whatever, I'll be fine." It's like, "No, you don't walk down the street, like in the street, because a bus, a car, a goat can come get you wherever you live."

Michael Jordan can come running down

There you go. Glad you didn't say Tom Brady. Ugh.

Ugh. That bitch.

Oh, jeez.

Woah!

Giselle's going to do a lot better, and she should.

Coming in hot on this mic, sorry.

So just for devil's avocado real quick.

He really wanted to use that.

I do think Bored Ape, that's It's not cool. It's not cool to mislead people in that way.

Yes.

But at the same time, to assume that you're buying any collectible, and it's on the collectible creator to give it value so you make more money, is also a very odd, very NFT-specific thing. Cause if I If I buy a pack of sports cards, I am not then opening it, getting a bunch of duds, no Tom Bradys, no Michael Jordans,

But I don't open a pack, get a bunch of duds, and then assume, "Oh, Panini made these cards. They need to make these more valuable."

Not the sandwich, the card manufacturer.

Yeah. But like just to buy anything and assume that the creator of that, Pokémon, should be making what I purchased more valuable when it's a collectible is also just a wrong way to look at it.

Well, it's like gambling. It's like I don't gamble because I'm like, "Oh, this is going to be a surefire thing." It's like you're buying in, like, because NFTs are now possibly going to be considered like stocks or

Securities.

There you go.

Investments that need to be regulated.

Yes. So, yeah, you don't buy into some like I'm jumping everywhere, but yes.

Well, no, yeah, it's just an odd It's an odd, precarious spot because I can see it from both parties

Yes.

Where it's sort of It's on the buyer, but it's also on the seller when they mislead people.

Yeah, when they don't disclose everything, then it is like, "Oh, that actually is like gross." Like, I mean, I wouldn't have a problem with it, personally, if they did disclose it, and then it's like, "Oh, okay, well, Paris Hilton got paid for it, that makes sense." But then,

And it usually doesn't even change anything. If you know that someone got paid for something, or you don't,

It's like, okay, I'm still going to get this then. Like, it doesn't really matter.

Yeah, so like in That's just weird to not do that.

Which is the inexperience in the space.

Yeah, fucking idiots. All right, moving along.

Our something borrowed/stolen this week is yet another successful case of repatriation. Yay!

I thought you were going to say, "I stole your heart," but whatever.

Yes, so I need to tell you about this man. No. This demigod.

Sorry, I said it so big.

I can say I think that is the only time I have ever and will ever be introduced like that, so thank you.

Always get a historian to introduce you because they will find all of the perfect adjectives. Anyway, so our something borrowed/stolen this week. So, like I said, successful case of repatriation.

This time, though, we're talking about the Netherlands and Mexico. So, this past week, the Netherlands returned 223 pre-Hispanic and pre-Colombian artifacts to Mexico.

These items that were returned to the INAH, which I'm going to call it by that acronym from now on, but it's the Instituto Nacional de Antropología e Historia, so apologies for mispronunciation, as always. So, the INAH oversees all of these different matters around the world and they keep tabs on things and try to get stuff back to Mexico.

So, the items that were returned from the Netherlands span the time periods of the Mesoamerican Preclassic period, so that's like 13th century BCE, the like latest, earliest.

I always get confused in my BCEs and CEs, so apologies. Just 13th century BCE, all the way to the Postclassic period, so roughly the 16th century CE. So, that's a big fucking chunk of change.

That's a huge timespan. And these items are also from a wide range of area in Mexico in a wide range of cultures, so in the east, the Central Highlands, the Gulf of Mexico, and the southeast region as well. The return of these items is part of a larger issue where pre-Hispanic and pre-Colombian artifacts are being illicitly trafficked around the world.

I did not know that. I actually I had heard about this before in grad school, just because I had a professor who specialized in Mesoamerican art, but I had no idea that this was such a big issue like around the globe. And since these items are cultural and archaeological property of Mexico, all these pieces fall under the Federal Law on Archaeological, Artistic, and Historical Monuments and Areas, which is to protect these places and objects, which I talked about in a previous episode.

I forget which number, but the asshole in Miami that I mean, that could be a lot of people. The asshole in Miami that set a Frida Kahlo artwork on fire, he's still being investigated, I assume, I hope, or it's probably getting brushed under the rug, but he lit a Frida Kahlo piece on fire to make an NFT project, speak of NFTs.

So, those are the bad people of NFTs. So that law is to protect all of these objects. Since 2018, there's been an even higher focus on having all of these items returned to Mexico because of Mexican President Andrés Manuel López and his administration launched the #MiPatrimonioNoSeVende movement, which is just my heritage is not for sale.

Sorry for all the mispronunciations. So, this movement was to discourage people from buying and selling all these different artifacts, and encourage people to actually celebrate and like hold these items with pride and value, and not be like, "Oh, I'm just going to sell it cuz I can make a quick buck."

To date, this movement, so in four years, they have assisted in the return of nearly 9,000 artifacts worldwide. Not Mr. Worldwide, but worldwide.

He's not from Mexico. Sadly though, in November, the INAH, so this organization from Mexico, they also tried to stop an auction in Paris that was selling 60 pre-Colombian archaeological artifacts by citing this law that prohibits the export of Mexican objects around the world because they have like cultural or archaeological importance.

They weren't able to do that, and I believe the things were still sold because this is outside of Mexico, so they couldn't control what happened, which is why the guy was just able to incinerate stuff in Miami for fun. So, I like the idea of the law. I wish it could go international, but I know international law is like not possible.

Be kind of cool. Yeah, so

So, I do have a question. It's it's a very No, no, no, it's it's only a terminology. What would be What is pre-Hispanic mean?

I don't know. No. So, pre-Hispanic is before Spanish conquistadors invaded the land and territory, so it's like pre-Colombian, so pre-Columbus.

It's kind of similar plus or minus like a couple hundred years. So, it's just before any sort of European colonization of the area,

Or the artifacts. So, before any sort of European influence came through and just changed everything and changed culture and dress and methods of production and stuff like that. So that's what it means.

So, it's it's before any sort of European influence, which is what makes it even cooler, because then it's like, "Oh, this is actually like authentic to this group and this culture for thousands of years, presumably." So, this is how they were doing things for forever. So, it's like our closest tie back to ancient, ancient times in this place or in this part of land or something.

So, yeah. The end.

Well, yeah, that's interesting. I've I've never heard pre-Hispanic and I just had no idea what that meant.

Now you know.

Well, thank you. Never stop creating.

Wait, I need to do my outro music. I know, I was just

All right, so that'll do it for this episode. Thanks so much for watching. Thank you, Mr.

Cerise, for being here on the podcast.

Yep.

I hope you had fun.

Oh.

I hope I didn't throw you off too much. I know I did, but

It's just weird having another human here cuz I'm used to talking to you intimately, but now I have like a little a little friend group. Hug! It's an air hug.

Hug!

So, with that, we'll see if we do this ever again. Probably not. I'll see how this goes when I edit this.

Oh, we'll be podcasting more.

We'll see. So, if you like this video, make sure you like it and subscribe. Let me know in the comments below if you enjoyed this episode.

If not, I'm so sorry, and we'll see how this goes. Yeah.

Sorry, not sorry.

I'm Amara Andrew. This is Jeff Cerise, and never stop creating. Oops, I turned that off a little too quick.

Yeah, that was a that was a quick ending.

Yeah, my bad. Ooh! Anyhoo.

All right, food?

Sure. What we all eating?

What do you want for dinner?

Ooh, good idea.

Okay, we'll do that.

I didn't hear you.

It's okay, I got you.

I don't know what.