We’re engaged! But before we share that story, we talk about pronoia (the opposite of paranoia), choosing to believe the universe is working in your favor. And how that simple shift changes what you notice, how you feel, and how you perform.
We also talk about a gratitude practice that’s not a reaction (“grateful for”), but surprisingly more effective.
Plus, a wiener dog joins the show mid-episode!
Mentioned in this Episode
So many kind strangers have randomly taken our photo and shared them with us over the past ten years. See them all here!
See the proposal photos on Instagram!
Timestamps
00:00 Pronoia Mindset Shift
02:10 From Funk to Optimism
04:56 Belief Creates Results
06:00 Nickelback and Perspective
07:33 Body Image Reframe
09:54 Gratitude as a Practice
10:52 A wiener dog joins us!
14:48 Strangers Taking Photos
18:59 Miami Beach Setup
19:28 Beach Stranger Approaches
20:19 Unexpected Photo Offer
21:06 Birthday Dinner Cover Plan
23:06 Staged Photo Setup
24:06 The Proposal Moment
25:43 Ring Details and Reactions
26:29 From No Marriage to Yes
28:01 Keeping Surprises Secret
29:28 Miami Favorites and Friends
32:07 Pronoia and Gratitude Mindset
34:55 Back to Work and Opportunity
35:41 Wrap Up
Transcript
Jeff Sarris: Choose to believe that the universe is conspiring behind your back to make you a success.
Amara Andrew: Hey, explorers, welcome back to Useful Not Famous, the show where we gather and share the secrets that give your business an unfair advantage. Darn tootin’. I’m Amara.
Jeff Sarris: I’m Jeff Sarris.
Amara Andrew: And if you are watching this, you can tell that we are not in our regularly scheduled programming spot.
We’re here on site. In South Beach. Yeah. In Miami.
Jeff Sarris: In Miami Beach.
Amara Andrew: One of our favorite places.
Jeff Sarris: Uhhuh.
Amara Andrew: And we have some big news, but we’re gonna share that later on in the show.
Jeff Sarris: We’ll tell the story later.
Amara Andrew: Yes.
Jeff Sarris: But what is the, uh, well first, that beginning, um,
Amara Andrew: where did
Jeff Sarris: it come from? Choosing that the world is conspiring to make us better?
Yes. To make us a success. It’s the opposite of paranoia. Paranoia is thinking, everyone’s out to get you, but there’s actually a word for it. It’s Pronoia. Mm. Which is like a really fun
Amara Andrew: Oh, that’s like positive too. Yeah, like pro something Uhhuh
Jeff Sarris: and like para, I don’t know why para. ’cause it sounds like, uh, uh,
Amara Andrew: parasite.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. Or like, uh, parles para,
Amara Andrew: same
Jeff Sarris: spelling. That’s an inside, it’s like it inside baseball, but it’s a, um, paranormal, like I think of paranormal like paranoia. But then pronoia,
Amara Andrew: huh?
Jeff Sarris: Which I think is, uh, it’s really fun to have the exact opposite because I covered, covered in beach
Amara Andrew: sand.
Jeff Sarris: No, you have like, looks like a little hair.
It might be a little, a little peeling to the dent. Oh yeah. Don’t rub it. It’s a little peeling. Oops. Oh no.
Amara Andrew: Uh oh.
Jeff Sarris: Well you’ve seen this in real time. Everyone. Yeah.
Amara Andrew: We literally just came up from the beach breaking news. Everyone my nose is peeling,
Jeff Sarris: but pronoia paranoia. So. Believing that the universe is conspiring for us.
Amara Andrew: That’s so interesting because it’s the exact opposite. I feel like how basically every person thinks because like
Jeff Sarris: by every person we mean
Amara Andrew: everyone.
Jeff Sarris: Oh, but also us.
Amara Andrew: Well, yeah, that’s what I’m like literally everybody. ’cause like I would say that we’re two very positive, like upbeat, like trying to think positively.
Always people. But yeah. Yeah, like on our last trip to Miami May of last year, which I can’t believe it’s been that long since we’ve been here, that’s like unheard of for us. Um, but I wasn’t in a good head space. Like I was in that paranoia space where it just felt like, uh, again, it’s all self-imposed. I wanna start with that, but the idea of.
See, not even having like everybody or everything against you. ’cause I didn’t think that, but it just, it felt very isolating and a lot of things happened at once that maybe weren’t my favorite things. So feeling like things weren’t working out, I guess is how I would say it. Because again, it wasn’t like, well, it’s me versus them and all that.
Like there was a degree of that. But not to the same extent that I think a lot of other people have.
Jeff Sarris: When I think zooming out a little more, it’s the, it’s not even as narrow, but there was a consistent worry.
Amara Andrew: Yes.
Jeff Sarris: So whether it’s like success and business growth or money or
Amara Andrew: relationship or whatever.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah.
The happiness or all of it.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Where. There was a point this year,
Amara Andrew: year when I, like I couldn’t get out of it.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah.
Amara Andrew: Which was really difficult.
Jeff Sarris: But then there was a point this year where I feel like it was just decided like, no, everything’s perfect.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. Well, and like it had to like. It kind of was just overnight that shift where it was like, ’cause like I can definitely get in a funk, like a depressive sort of state and just stay in that for like months and not come out of it, or even like weeks, whatever.
And it takes a long time to get out of it. But I think you, my little eternal optimist, you were just like, like something that you always say is like, everything always works out. And that’s true, but like you had said that, but I think it was just the way you said it or how you said it, it just felt like, yeah, why am I upset?
Or like feeling sorry for myself or like, I don’t even know how to describe it, but why am I not feeling happy and positive and being stuck in this negative mental space when that’s not doing any good? It’s only hurting me and like I need to just. Work through it and actually be successful and like get myself to a spot where I do feel good and do feel proud.
But it was very hard to get out of that. But then as soon as you, it was just the way you said it, I don’t know what it was. And I was just like, yeah, what the hell am I doing? This isn’t me. I don’t know if it was like my gut bacteria or what.
Jeff Sarris: Well, no, but it’s hard.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Um, because everything, we wanna improve everything.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: We are problem solvers and solution makers.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. Well, and I’m very hard on myself always,
Jeff Sarris: but like everything is what we think it is.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: If we think, if we think the world is negative and everyone’s negative
Amara Andrew: mm-hmm.
Jeff Sarris: We’re going to find that. And that’s the crazy thing. If we think everything’s perfect.
We are perfect. Like meaning like in the best way? Not
Amara Andrew: well, yeah, not arrogant.
Jeff Sarris: Like, like I, if you physically feel good about how you look, you’re going to end up looking better. If you physically feel good, if you mentally feel good about how you think and how smart you are or how capable you are, you are going to be more capable.
You don’t have someone, uh. Like a relentless person like, uh, Michael Jordan or uh, Tom Brady. You don’t have them doubting. That’s not a, they’re never self-deprecating. They’re purely only ever I am going to be the best. And that’s how you become the best. ’cause you can’t question if you will, you do it. Um.
And I dunno, when you were just talking, it reminded me of this one, uh, Nickelback song, which I know is your favorite band ever.
Amara Andrew: He loves Nickelback.
Jeff Sarris: Well, yeah, I mean, there’s reasons and you need to, uh, there’s more context, but they’re better than you think. They’re,
Amara Andrew: they actually are I, as a self proclaimed nickelback hater from way back from the, the aughts
Jeff Sarris: sheep.
Amara Andrew: I can confirm. There are some actual bangers that I didn’t know were Nickelback and he’s played them. And I was like, who’s this? And then he is like, Nickelback. And I was like. And then I was like, okay, fine. It’s really good.
Jeff Sarris: Well, yeah, they know how to write hits and that’s why. Yes. So it, there’s a whole, there was a guy that did a deep dive recently about why people hate Nickelback.
And it comes down to purely, it was just making do, making it cool to hate them,
Amara Andrew: uhhuh.
Jeff Sarris: And uh, like it came down to one, one person who made an offhanded quick joke on Comedy Central, who, if anyone looked at him, you wouldn’t be like, that’s who I wanna be. Like, yeah, like the. Everything. It’s just so silly.
But when you trace it back to there, you can see it like go out. But they have a song called, uh, somebody Wishes They Were You.
Amara Andrew: Hmm.
Jeff Sarris: Which I think is, I always thought was a very. Apt thing. ’cause we all think like, uh, like I only wish this, I only wish that Yeah. But like somebody out there wishes they were you
Amara Andrew: uhhuh.
Jeff Sarris: And that’s always true no matter who you are in any capacity. Yeah. Like you could, you could think you’re down in the dumps and like nothing’s working out. But then there’s people who are dealing with other things who only wish they could be where you are.
Amara Andrew: Well, yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Or you could be top of the food chain.
But you still are going to wish you were this other person,
Amara Andrew: and this is such a minor thing, but like, uh, I had gained like maybe 10 or 15 pounds. Then, uh, at a certain point I was where I felt like so lean and so like skinny and everything. It’s all mental, but I was just like, I don’t know what it was. I just had this epiphany where I was like, no, I’m, and this sounds so self-aggrandizing, but I’m somebody’s after picture.
Like I’m where somebody wants to get to right now when I don’t feel the best in my body. Thinking that I instantly, I swear to God, I lost like 10 pounds. Like I just, I felt the shift, and now when I see photos of myself, I don’t feel as bad. Like obviously there’s always room for improvement, but I don’t feel as like, ugh, I don’t know.
It was just that little shift in how I was viewing myself. That made a huge difference.
Jeff Sarris: Well, and you would’ve loved. To be in the shape you are at other times in your life and that’s what’s hard to
remember.
Amara Andrew: Oh yeah. Because now I’m actually fit, like I have muscle. Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Uhhuh. So
Amara Andrew: I need
Jeff Sarris: to remember that.
It’s D that’s talked about like you work out and you’re like,
Amara Andrew: I know
Jeff Sarris: you’re,
Amara Andrew: but I’m used to like ballerina body where you just be as skinny as possible. Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Was striving for it.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Not that that’s what you like, were
Amara Andrew: No, but that’s like, that was kind of the objective is like you go for that like super, super skinny, like at least.
For me, it’s the,
Jeff Sarris: uh, what was the documentary we just watched? Which that true.
Amara Andrew: Oh, America’s Next Top Model. Yeah, like that, that fucked me up as a kid. I didn’t realize it, but rewatching it. I was like, oh God, this is partly where it all comes from.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. We didn’t rewatch the show, but there’s a documentary there was actually really good
Amara Andrew: about, it was really
Jeff Sarris: good.
Amara Andrew: Yeah, I really liked it and like, as a fan of the show, apparently I watched so much of it. I didn’t realize it, and then just rewatching it. I’m like. Oh, that’s where some of these things come from. Like these, these negative thought. Yeah,
Jeff Sarris: the body dysmorphia kind of things.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. So anyway, I’m just like, I’m happy with how I am, like my body functions.
And I think too, talking to people from different walks of life and maybe. Like certain people don’t quite have mobility or they’re super fit and they’re like a hundred years old. Like just hearing all these stories and getting to talk to people and being like, wow, like they’re so fit and they’re this like old, or maybe like use this as a cautionary tale or whatever it is.
And just like making sure my body’s as healthy as possible. I think, I don’t know, not to bring it to like that, but I know that that’s something that a lot of women out there can identify with.
Jeff Sarris: Well, yeah, and just, uh, in general, just. Like, I really think belief is everything.
Amara Andrew: That was what I was gonna bring up when you were talking about Michael Jordan and all the, the things I heard this, uh, on TikTok as always, there’s a rabbi that I really like what he says.
It’s not for religious or anything context, but it’s just purely the philosophy, like the philosophical viewpoints and human condition. Uh. Just like the examples and the things that he says I find I really like and it resonates with me, but it was obviously, I’m paraphrasing ’cause he has like a very eloquent way of speaking.
But it was just have gratitude in the morning. It’s not for what? It’s not, I’m grateful for this, or I’m,
Jeff Sarris: that was interesting when he said it.
Amara Andrew: I loved it like that.
Jeff Sarris: Like go on, keep going. I just remembered now I forgot where you’re
Amara Andrew: going. But it was like, we always have gratitude for something. It’s a reaction.
It’s
Jeff Sarris: okay. There’s a wiener dog and I can actually turn this camera Oh. And show you. There’s a wiener dog. Wait, am I going the wrong way? I’m go the wrong way.
Oh
Amara Andrew: my goodness, sweetie. No, you love it. Oh my goodness. There is the cutest little wiener dog,
Jeff Sarris: so if you watch it, even actually see him.
Amara Andrew: Hello?
Jeff Sarris: Oh my goodness.
Amara Andrew: We love wiener dogs. Hi. Oh, this is the best day ever.
Oh my goodness. Hey, milli. Cutie.
Jeff Sarris: What’s her name? Rufuss.
Amara Andrew: Rufuss. Oh my goodness.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. To move this down.
Amara Andrew: Rufus
Jeff Sarris: guy.
Amara Andrew: Stay here.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. It’s so cute.
Amara Andrew: Oh my goodness. I think we need a dachshund.
Jeff Sarris: I know.
Amara Andrew: Oh,
Jeff Sarris: sorry. I feel like we took them
Amara Andrew: whoopies.
Jeff Sarris: Watch your bud.
Amara Andrew: Whoop. You good? Oh, you tied up. No, you can’t. There you go.
Thank. Bye. Oh my goodness. That’s the best I ever. Well,
Jeff Sarris: that was, and I’m glad I had the camera to turn it know, move it. I
Amara Andrew: know that was an early birthday gift.
Jeff Sarris: He keep
Amara Andrew: straight through us.
Jeff Sarris: Okay, here we go. So now we got the camera back in and we are back. He like,
Amara Andrew: I don’t wanna leave.
Jeff Sarris: He was so cute, adorable.
He just like saw us. He knew. We were like ready.
Amara Andrew: He is like coming perfect. Like. Brown long fur, uh, dachshund. He
Jeff Sarris: was trying, he was trying to come back.
Amara Andrew: Oh, he’s like, they were nice. Okay. It was so soft. See, grateful. Anyway, so grateful. So back to gratitude,
Jeff Sarris: just being grateful, period.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. So typically, and he didn’t say it like this, but I just had the unlock of, typically when we’re grateful or have gratitude for something, it’s in reaction.
So it’s like, well, I’m grateful for this. Earth. I’m grateful for the water, the food that I have on my table. I’m grateful for you. Like it’s a, it’s typically a reaction to something like an action that just happened or an emotion. Like
Jeff Sarris: I’m just like caught up with that.
Amara Andrew: I know he’s gonna be, he’s gonna be sort of out of it from, but that’s typically how we respond to gratitude as a reaction.
But the way that he said it, it made me think of gratitude as an action. Just I’m grateful that’s it. I’m just, I’m grateful. First thing when I wake up in the morning, not I’m grateful because I woke up. Not that I’m grateful because we’re in Miami or anything. No, because, no reaction. Just purely, I’m grateful and just having that feeling all the time, like that’s made me so incredibly just like at peace and happy.
And I think you’ve sort of picked up on that just like. I don’t even know how to describe it, but just that thought process with everything else that we’ve been like reading and learning and thinking about and trying to dissect has been so incredibly valuable. And it’s not like I’ve forgotten it at certain points, but just trying to live and be grateful for, not even grateful for.
Just grateful.
Jeff Sarris: Uh, well, and it’s, again, this comes back to mindset and we don’t like mindset. Only because it’s the first step.
Amara Andrew: And if that’s the only thing that you’re doing, that’s a big no-no.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. ’cause you can’t focus only on mindset and not actually like
Amara Andrew: I thought you saw the doggy again. Oh no.
Jeff Sarris: I’m still trying to find the dog.
He was like right here. I was just like, I think, geez, ours now
Amara Andrew: I can’t wait to watch your face again because you’re just like, I know you. You’re like, take or oops. Spilling the news.
Jeff Sarris: Oh no. Um. But yeah, because it is when we believe in, like we have to believe it though.
Amara Andrew: Yes.
Jeff Sarris: And we believe everything is dread.
We believe that we attract. Positive attention in dogs. Uh, we believe positive, uh, energy.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Um, so it is, I don’t wanna leave the topic, but I feel like that does tie into where we’re going with sort of our, our news for the trip.
Amara Andrew: Oh, no, that’s
Jeff Sarris: fine. So one of the things that happens to us all the time, and it’s happened today, today.
Is 10 years that we’ve gotten, like, oh, when we started, we got to know each other. Was today 10 years ago?
Amara Andrew: It is, yeah. It was literally the day before my birthday,
Jeff Sarris: Uhhuh.
Amara Andrew: Wow. So,
Jeff Sarris: uh,
Amara Andrew: that’s crazy. March 2nd, 2016.
Jeff Sarris: Uhhuh, we’re actually recording this on the day we’re gonna post it. Yeah. Which is uh, see you in a couple hours.
Yeah. But 10 years ago today.
Amara Andrew: That’s so crazy.
Jeff Sarris: And then, I don’t know, a month, two months or whatever the first time we hung out, just as. We walked around the city in Chicago and hung out, and then we went to the beach for a little bit. Mm-hmm. And just, we were just sitting there, just hanging out, enjoying the, enjoying the summer vibe.
So yeah. It was a couple months later. A few months later. Yeah.
Amara Andrew: It was in May, I think.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. Um, and it was a nice sunny day. So we were sitting on the beach and then all of a sudden someone walks up behind us. And was just like, oh, excuse me, that I don’t wanna bother you, but you guys look cute together. And I took these photos.
I don’t know if you’d want them, but I could send them to you.
Amara Andrew: And we weren’t anything at that point. Yeah. Just friends uhhuh. But I was like, well, this is cool.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. So then. That person. I don’t even know if it was air. It was 2016. I don’t remember if Airdrop was really that I good yet. No, I think she
Amara Andrew: texted it
Jeff Sarris: to you.
I think that’s what it was. Yeah. So then, yeah, so then we got these photos and we had ’em and it’s like, well that’s fun Uhhuh. We have photos of like the first time we hung out.
Amara Andrew: Oh yeah. It was like, that’s so random.
Jeff Sarris: And then on March 3rd, the following year, Amar’s birthday, we were at the, uh, conservatory in the city.
Amara Andrew: Wasn’t that the following year or two years after? I think it
Jeff Sarris: was two years after. Okay. I think it was two. Okay. Yeah. And then someone saw us and they had a Polaroid camera. They’re like, can I actually take your picture in front of everything?
Amara Andrew: But see, between that time we weren’t our normal positive selves.
Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: The time when we weren’t, when people, we didn’t, we had someone see us.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: And then, uh, it was a tough period of time.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: And then, yeah, 2018, your birthday
Amara Andrew: Uhhuh.
Jeff Sarris: Then people, someone saw us and saw how. Positive and whatever it was. And they wanted to take our photo. Yeah. So like they took our photo on a Polaroid and gave it to us
Amara Andrew: Uhhuh.
Jeff Sarris: So that was the second time a stranger decided to take our photo. And this is where I’m going with this, is we have then what’s the third time?
Amara Andrew: Uh, third time was here on my birthday. Yeah. Like the year after that
Jeff Sarris: same idea.
Amara Andrew: And then
Jeff Sarris: we were on the beach. Yeah. And we were just sort of laughing and hugging or whatever.
And then someone was like, oh, you guys look cute. I took, again, it was a Polaroid. I took this of you. I dunno if you want it. But uh,
Amara Andrew: and then again, was May of last year.
Jeff Sarris: Well, before that. Uh, then in Italy
Amara Andrew: Oh yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Where you were at the
Amara Andrew: Trev Fountain. I was like, I’m missing one. Yeah. At the Tre fountain for my dad’s birthday.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. So that was like two years ago now.
Amara Andrew: Yeah,
Jeff Sarris: three, two years.
Amara Andrew: Two,
Jeff Sarris: yeah. So we were there. Yeah. And then someone walked up and she was just like, you guys looked really cute together. So I just took these photos. Do do the, you have to do it with the accent?
Amara Andrew: No, she’s American.
Jeff Sarris: No, she wasn’t. She was definitely Italian.
Amara Andrew: I thought she was American
Jeff Sarris: Uhuh.
Amara Andrew: Oh,
Jeff Sarris: I dunno. Or she was definitely not a American English speaker. It, it was an accent.
Amara Andrew: Did she,
Jeff Sarris: I just, I, that accent was, I, let’s cut that.
Amara Andrew: That was offensive to Italians or whatever. That was everywhere.
Jeff Sarris: Um, but then she was like, like. I don’t know if you want, but here’s a photo.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. She is just like, you look so cute. You smell like a past.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. But
Amara Andrew: number one most offensive podcast in the United States.
Jeff Sarris: Um, pasta talk. Yeah. So that was number four, I think. And then the next one was here in Miami last May.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: When we were, we had such a great time, Uhhuh, and it was the Aaron Sea Show.
Yeah. And we were, we did. It was so silly.
Amara Andrew: Silly. I was trying to time a photo
Jeff Sarris: and I was filming while we were doing that and then someone saw us doing it and filmed us doing it. So it’s so meta. And then she is like, I thought that was fun. So do you want the, this video I took of you Uhhuh? So fast forward to last Thursday?
Amara Andrew: Yes,
Jeff Sarris: and I had something planned for the evening. However, we’re on the beach Thursday morning,
Amara Andrew: Uhhuh our first day here in Miami.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah,
Amara Andrew: like literally 10 minutes on the beach at the very most.
Jeff Sarris: And we were in a spot around a whole, uh, event that just finished. There were all, it was all the fencing, so we were at a spot where not a lot of people were.
And. And we’re just sitting there and we roll over and we’re facing away from the ocean. And then a guy’s walking straight towards us from the distance. And I recognize that he was just sitting to our left, but clearly he left and he was coming back. He was walking directly towards us and he walks all the way up.
And then what does it say?
Amara Andrew: And my first thought was like, oh God, what do you want? Yeah. Because like you do have people on the beach be like, Hey, do you want whatever I,
Jeff Sarris: we live in Chicago, so we’re used to that.
Amara Andrew: Well, yeah. I’m just used to just being like, what? So then he comes up and he’s like, Hey, excuse me.
Uh. He also had an accent. I’m not gonna be offensive to Germans everywhere. Oh yeah, he was
Jeff Sarris: European. Oh, there
Amara Andrew: go um, just from his name. I’m a hundred percent. Oh yeah, sure. He was German. He had a great tan though. Um, though he had a great tan. Well, ’cause you don’t think of Germans as being tan, but he had a great tan.
Jeff Sarris: He looked more European. But anyway,
Amara Andrew: yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Yes.
Amara Andrew: Uh, so he just comes up and he’s just like, Hey, like, uh, I actually, I took these photos of you. I don’t know if you want them. And I was like, holy fucking shit. And then immediately I’m like, oh my God. Okay, thank you. Best friends laugh.
Jeff Sarris: Well no, and you’re just like, you’ll never guess.
But this happens. A
Amara Andrew: lot all over the world now we can say with Italy. Um, and he’s just like, oh, well, yeah, you can just, you feel the energy, like the good vibes from you guys. I wish I remembered exactly what he said, but it was something like
that.
Jeff Sarris: Well, yeah, you said whatever. We wrote it down and I don’t wanna grab it right now to say I have the camera go on my phone, but,
Amara Andrew: but yeah, it was something like, you can just see the energy.
Jeff Sarris: Well, it’s the energy you give.
Amara Andrew: That’s what it was.
Jeff Sarris: That’s how you said it.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: And I was just like, this is crazy. Um, okay, cool. This is awesome
Amara Andrew: Uhhuh because. Jinx
Jeff Sarris: because of all of this. I had a good diversion for the evening, so we were going to dinner. ’cause it’s your birthday tomorrow.
Amara Andrew: Yes.
Jeff Sarris: But I was like, we don’t wanna burn the first day.
We wanna make sure we. Uh, have to be outta the sun. So I’m like, I planned your birthday dinner on Thursday. The Thursday before the 26th. Yeah. So then, uh, we had to be in, we had to like clean up and get ready ’cause it was gonna be a nicer dinner. And I was like, we should walk along the beach and then go to dinner from there.
And I was, uh, a little concerned ’cause a few times we like. Do we have to go on the beach?
Amara Andrew: Well, yeah. I was like, how about we just go after dinner?
Jeff Sarris: Because we didn’t, well, you didn’t even, you didn’t lead with that. You kept saying, unless we have to go. And I was like, I feel like she’s onto me. And then
Amara Andrew: I literally, I had no idea.
I just meant like, unless we have to go like, you really? ’cause you did a good job playing it off like. Like, I had no idea what was going on. You said, but you’re gonna hear what was going on in a minute. But
Jeff Sarris: do we have to? Yeah. And I was like, we don’t have to, but I’d like to. I think it’d be nice to walk along the beach.
We didn’t get to yesterday.
Amara Andrew: Yeah.
Jeff Sarris: Because the day that we landed, we, we walked on the sand, but on the other side of the fencing.
Amara Andrew: Yeah,
Jeff Sarris: that was there for the event because uh, we were very hungry. Yeah. So we were just like, let’s get some drowning. Get our feet in the sand.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. So that was a good, uh, diversion.
So then I was just like, okay, fine. He wants more beach time and like the sun isn’t as intense ’cause we’re trying to not damage our skin. So I was like, okay, fine, whatever. But I was like, but I don’t wanna have like sandy feet and messed up hair especially ’cause we’re going
You’re
Jeff Sarris: perfect.
Amara Andrew: I know
Jeff Sarris: your hair’s perfect,
Amara Andrew: especially ’cause we’re gonna a nice restaurant or so I thought, I mean we did and we were
Jeff Sarris: Yeah.
Amara Andrew: We were,
Jeff Sarris: but then, uh, we’re walking along the beach. We walk around the fencing and get onto the shoreline and we’re walking just for a little bit. I actually had the 360 camera so we could get us, uh, in space. ’cause we love being here and like have us, uh, filmed.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. Like none of it felt out of the ordinary at all.
Like I literally had no idea.
Jeff Sarris: And then in the distance there’s someone like with a camera. And she takes our photo and then when we get up there, she’s like, oh, I don’t wanna bother you. But I was just, I’m testing out my new lens and I took this photo of you guys. Would you mind if I just take another one?
If I like if I take a photo of you in front of the ocean?
Amara Andrew: But I was like, yeah, sure, why not
Jeff Sarris: Uhhuh? And
Amara Andrew: we pose
Jeff Sarris: next to each other. I could only imagine. Look on my face and I’m like listening to her.
Amara Andrew: I cannot wait to look back at that footage
Jeff Sarris: then. Yeah,
Amara Andrew: go on. Yeah. So then we pose. Together in front of the ocean.
And then she’s like, okay, great. Now look at each other. So I was like,
Jeff Sarris: yeah, face each other.
Amara Andrew: Okay. And I was like,
Jeff Sarris: and then what happened when you looked at me?
Amara Andrew: And I was just like, are you okay? Because his eyes were watering like no other. And I was like, did something happen? Like, what’s wrong? Yeah. You’re
Jeff Sarris: just like, well, because you’re very sweet.
So she’s like, oh my gosh, what happened? What’s wrong?
Amara Andrew: Well, yeah, like you were very, because I just, I panicked ’cause I was like, you. He never, never cries. Like only very. Few times I’ve seen him cry, but I was just like, are you okay? Like, what’s wrong?
Jeff Sarris: And then I just said three words. I was like 10 years ago
Amara Andrew: and I was like,
Jeff Sarris: and then you started
Amara Andrew: ugly crying.
Also, for the record, I never put mascara on my bottom lap. I like
Jeff Sarris: that you brought this up to everyone.
Amara Andrew: It’s so funny. It was just a fucking mess. Like I normally wear waterproof mascara because my eyes just water and not waterproof mascara and on the bottom lashes. And it was just like, I couldn’t, I don’t even know what you saw, but, well
Jeff Sarris: that was just sweet to then I’m just like, oh my sweetie.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. So
Jeff Sarris: then I said what I wanted to say
Amara Andrew: because I like, I realized then take fucking long enough what was happening and I’m like shaking like this and I was like, ah. Is this what I think it is? And I was like, are you fucking with me? And then he like gets down on his knee and like he said, like a really nice whole proposal.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. And then well that’s funny because I’m like, I could say, but no, that’s like just for us.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. That’s why I’m not telling anybody. Yeah.
I don’t know. I just want it for us. Um, yeah. Then he gets down on one knee and I’m like, this really is happening. And it felt so surreal. Like, ’cause we’ve talked about it now before, we never wanted to get married. So that was the interesting, not interesting thing, but like, when we met, neither of us, we were just like, we’re good.
Jeff Sarris: Like, that’s not, yeah. We weren’t ever gonna get married. No, we never even said, uh, we never actually said what happened. What do you mean? So I got on a knee. Oh yeah. So you got down on the knee and then, and then you just asked, um, if it be mind forever, if it would be worse forever. And she said yes. I said.
Amara Andrew: Holy shit. I thought, oh my God, oh my God. And then you’re like, that’s the most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen in my entire life. If you wanna see it go to my socials or his socials, like, it’s so beautiful. It’s perfect clarity. Perfect Cut, perfect color. Like literally everything is perfect. It’s so weird because it feels like it blows in the dark, but.
I swear to God I’ve never seen a, like a diamond this beautiful before. And like the ring, the actual band is a knife cut. Yeah, knife edge. Knife edge. So you can fit diamonds not only on the front side but also on the backside. So it has diamonds everywhere. Well, yeah, it’s just a very beautiful, unique, it had to be perfect and not common.
Well, yeah, I love that it’s unique. Like I never thought of myself as a diamond gal, but uh, I’m definitely a diamond, diamond dandy now. But we, so we never thought about, so we’re engaged. Yeah. We never, when we met, we weren’t going to get married or anything. Yeah. ’cause it was like neither of us. It didn’t matter.
Jeff Sarris: ’cause being together was everything. Exactly. So then I had a little, uh, thing when I asked you to move in that I did. That was like a fun little, it was so cool. It was like a cryptics, is that what it’s called? Yeah. Cryptics. Yeah. Where he had, uh. In the town that we met, he had like a whole little scavenger hunt, which was so cool.
Amara Andrew: So he had little envelopes and then each one had a clue to different places that like meant something to us Uhhuh. So then finally, and this is out years ago. This is eight years ago? Yeah. This is back in, uh, December, 2018. So then, uh, yeah, each part of those clues made up a letter on the Cryptics. ’cause that’s like a.
If you’ve ever seen the Da Vinci code, it’s like, it makes, it’s one word is like the key to opening it and then the side opens and then, yeah, then he asked me to move in, which is so cute. So we thought that was just gonna be the only thing. Well, yeah. So I, I wanted that to be really special and it was, and then he moved it and then like slowly with time we’re like, well, well, yeah, it was mostly me.
Jeff Sarris: I mean, there is something, uh, sweet about getting hitched up. Well, yeah. And especially just ’cause it’s like it’s us forever. Then I was like. And there’s never been a question. I feel like I’m changing my tune. Uhhuh. Well, so it’s been a while. Yeah. So what would you normally do with your hand? I’d go Sparkle.
Amara Andrew: Sparkle. So I’d be like, it’s looking a little, not sparkly over here, but yeah. Now I can’t do it anymore. It was hard though, because then. We don’t we’re We are. Okay. We’re together. If you don’t know us 99% of the time. Yeah. If you don’t actually know us. Only pooping and showering, but we’re still in the same house.
Yeah. I do mine in the backyard, but other than that, yeah. And I do mine. I just have a nice pile going. Yeah, it’s great. It’s good for organic mulch. Yeah. We’re together a hundred percent of the time, like a hundred percent. So keeping any secret and making any surprise also with her, because she is very.
Jeff Sarris: Very perceptive. Where we’ll, we’ll, we’ll watch a movie that you should not be able to figure out. And we’re two minutes in and she figures out the like answer. So I’m like, just don’t tell me what your thought is yet, because I just wanna enjoy the movie. Well, and. If you’ve ever tried to plan anything, I feel like I normally have an idea of what it is.
Yes. But the move in I didn’t see coming. I think I saw it coming a little bit more, but not as much. This I 110% did not see coming. Like you didn’t act weird, which I was so happy pick up on anything that I was able to sneak it by. But I think too full roundabout to the beginning of the show, I’ve just tried to be more in the moment and just.
Amara Andrew: Yeah, not ’cause I’ll live 20 years in the future and be like, well I should be doing this or I should be doing that and I’m not doing enough and I need to do this and like stressing myself out. And we’ve said this entire trip before this even was the most calm, best time we’ve had here. I think by far forever, well also leading up to it.
And we’ve come to Miami a million times, like too many times. Lot too many, but a lot less for going to Miami. Yeah. Like if you think us, you associate us with Miami. Well here here’s one quick little fun, fun tidbit. The best gluten-free pizza on the planet is here in Miami Beach. It’s at LA Agenda. So good.
Jeff Sarris: And as soon as you posted our photos of this, one of the first people to engage with it was LA because like they so nice. We love la The uh, sort of the, the guy from there is so nice. We always see him and talk to him. Wait, we’ve gotten to know them a little bit. We almost have more friends. We have more friends in Miami Beach than we do where we live.
Amara Andrew: Oh, a hundred percent. Which is funny. Every single restaurant and place we go to that we just frequent, they come up, they’re like, hi, how are you? And give us kisses and hugs. It’s like, we’re family basically Kiss, kissing. Oh no. Just like the, the European kiss. I don’t kiss no anyone. And then kissed on the lips with the one lady.
No, you didn’t see that. Oh, no. She is really excited to see me. Um, but no, just like the, the, the, well, yeah, on the cheek like a friend kiss, but again, full circle, believing that the world is conspiring to make us a success. And like, I think because here, like when we’re, when we’re feeling our best is when everything is the best.
Jeff Sarris: Uh, it’s very interesting. Yeah. Um, and I think that there is, there is a magic to that and like how that I, I cannot believe. That the morning of the, so obviously I didn’t say it. We didn’t say it, but I had the photographer hired for the evening there. Yeah. That was an actual person. That was not a random person.
I should be obvious we didn’t explicitly say it. Oh, and that’s what you said. But the guy in the proposal. Yeah, you said, and it’s not on ac, like she’s here on purpose. Uhhuh, like that was just part of it, but um, but the guy earlier was definitely, yeah, just random. Like, that was crazy. That makes no sense.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. No zero sense that it happened again, but yeah. Yeah. So, oh, and if you wanna see all the photos, go to what does maven.com/strangers. And the photo, the photos from, uh, the photo from the guy and from the proposal aren’t up there yet, but they will be soon. Yeah. That’s so crazy. But yeah, so that’s why we’re here in Miami.
Jeff Sarris: We’re also here for your birthday. Tomorrow is the old birthday. Well, yeah. And it was perfect that you had my birthday as sort of a cushion of sorts. Well, yeah. So like if Yeah. To like have cover. Yeah. So maybe that’s even why too, like if you were acting weird, I was like, oh, he has like something planned for my birthday.
Amara Andrew: I didn’t realize I was gonna be coming away with the best gift ever. You okay, good. And the ring, I was just like, no. It’s like, it’s seriously stupid, shiny. I can’t stop looking at it anyway. But yeah, just sort of believing that the world is out to get us into a better world, into a better us. Yeah, it really, I feel like it just works.
Jeff Sarris: Like there’s been times where I’ve definitely spiraled too, but my. The me at my core has been, it always works out. Oh yeah. That’s you. That’s your default setting. Yeah. Or at least somehow where I’ve gotten to. Yeah, no, that is definitely your default when I feel that it literally does work out and like there’s a lot of it that it’s action too.
It’s not, it’s not that it’s gonna work out. Let me lay on the couch all day for a month and wait for it to work out. It’s, oh, it’s gonna work out. Let me just see which, which of the. Stepping stones we’re gonna follow. Yeah. And it will work out. Something I was thinking about when I was waiting for you this morning was not because I slept uh, a bit later than sweetie.
Amara Andrew: Yeah. But that’s good. So yeah, I just had my matcha. I sat on the patio. It was quite lovely. Blue lavender. Check it out. Uh, the thing that I was thinking about. Was just like not having the feeling of, well, I deserve this. ’cause I feel like I’ve also sort of gotten trapped in that thought. I work so hard, therefore, yeah.
Like, well, no, I should have this, or I should have people coming to me being like, Hey, I need to work with you, blah. Like that is very, it is something that I’ve had lately. Just that like, well, no, I work hard so I should. Buy myself this thing or do this or do that, or expect this. And having the expectations like we’ve talked about, isn’t good because you’re setting yourself up for failure.
And it’s just not realistic, and it’s not beneficial and it doesn’t actually lead to any sort of growth or positivity. It’s just expecting something. And I wanna make sure I’m always grateful for absolutely nothing and. Not expecting anything. I wanna be sure. I’m grateful for absolutely nothing. It’s funny because if you only take those words, it sounds negative.
Jeff Sarris: Free for nothing. Yeah. Not needing anything to be grateful for. Yeah. In order to feel gratitude, purely grateful. That’s it. Just grateful for whatever. Mm-hmm. Anything. Nothing, whatever. But then not expecting that, well, I’ve done this so I should have this. Like any sort of outcome. Both of those things, I want to try to remember as much as possible, but it’s a practice like mm-hmm.
Amara Andrew: It’s not gonna be perfect. It’s not always gonna be a hundred percent at the top of my mind, but I meant to say that to you earlier, but that like popped into my head this morning as I was just sitting there. I was like. Yeah. Why am I like expecting certain things? Like no, just work harder and make things happen.
Which is then why I was thinking about highway and I have so many things to fill you in on. But anyway, uh, to Jeff. Yeah. After this trip, Jeff, we’ll fill you in too at some point after this trip. We’re excited. Definitely before July. Yeah. We’re actually excited to be back, uh, later this week because Get to work.
Jeff Sarris: Yeah. Then we’re getting right back to building all these things we’re working on, which is a lot of fun. And I think it’s gonna be. Even be, I say it every single time, but I genuinely think it’s gonna be even better. Even better. Like, well, yeah, I had a big unlock this point. There’s so much opportunity right now.
Yes. And it’s because we believe there’s opportunity and suddenly it all showed up. Yeah. A little butter in your foot. Sorry. There’s the aunt on my toe. I was like, ah, where’s that doggie again? Yeah, we gotta go find the doggie. So, but yeah, we gotta go grab lunch. Uhhuh. But yeah, pronoia, yes, it’s uh, it’s a thing.
Amara Andrew: Yep. Like emails just, just like emails. Emails. But yeah. So I think that’s it for today. Yes. Um, oh, 36 minutes. Wow. Cool. A full episode. Yeah. Yeah. Full transparency. We tried to record this last night and it was too much going on. Yeah. We were sitting. I just wanna get, it was a whole thing, a little bit behind the scenes secret sauce.
We did try recording this last night to have it out this morning, but there was, it was too much. The moment we sat outside, the music kicked on really loud. Not even too, the moment we hit record, the music started and then I just got so distracted and we were just, I felt like I was much better. Episode.
Yes. So anyway, so for, so if you need to rerecord things, just do it and you’ll feel so much better because I feel so much better. Waiting. Even if it’s a little bit delayed, so to speak. Oh yeah. And we have to share, uh, our story. Yeah. We’re engaged.
We’re gonna be Mr. And Mrs. That’s crazy. Alright. So I was like, where are you going?
You’re like, I’m finding the doggy. We need to get, uh, our thumbnail photo at the end. Okay. Just however you wanna do it. But thanks for tuning in. We’ll see you next time. Bye.